Saturday, August 24, 2013

“A dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.”
― Mary Karr, The Liars' Club

I read this and laughed!  I come from a reasonably large family....not necessarily a large family with reason.  With the birth of my own kids, I inadvertently continued the tradition.  You can not have a family of individuals without challenges.  A family is made of humans so to expect perfection is ridiculous.  Family like most things in life is a process --and that being said we might as well embrace the dysfunction which is a natural consequence of that process.

Ask me how I feel about my family and it will depend on the moment in time that you are asking the question.  Ask me if I love my family, I will mostly answer yes.  Threaten my family and I turn into a she-bear protecting even the member who I have the most problems with.  That is just the way it is.

I think that God gives us family so we can learn about tolerance and patience and forgiveness.  On good days I am up for the lesson.  On bad days, I am harsh judge and extremely intolerant.  Just because the same blood runs through our veins does not guarantee that we will always like each other.--or even sometimes like each other.

This coming weekend, all my siblings that are still alive will be in town.  One would assume that we will all greet each other with unconditional love.  (If that happens it will be a miracle!)  We have our own agendas and what will happen will happen.  It would be a special gift to our mother if we can just stop for a second and be grateful for the gift os our family.  We would not be who we are without it....we became who we are in spite of it... and we might as well accept our DNA.

I am sharing all of this because I think all of us take this part of life way to seriously--me included.   If we could look at our families with love and a sense of humor and realize that we are as much to blame for the outcome of our relationships as "they" are, then the air of tolerance and compassion would take precedence when we are all stuck in the same room together.  Besides, it is only a weekend.  Thank God,when it is over we can go back home to our own lives!

Now, if by chance my brothers are reading this, please remember
* I am the oldest and it is my job to tell you what to do
* I figured out that at sixty two I am entitled to state my opinion and I don't have worry about  the         consequences any more
*Most of the time, I am proud of you all
*We will have difference of opinions, more often than not.
*When forced to admit it, I do love all of you....honest...and I want you to have good lives.

Thank you God for the gift of family.  Without it, my life would be boring, and I would only be half the person I am today. Embrace all of our lives with love and help us to see each other with your eyes,

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